PRESS RELEASE
Northern Phoenix Council Elects Director and Rebuilds the Brand
20230102 Pacific – Over the course of 2022 the Northern Phoenix Council has been making changes to its brand to be more inclusive. One inclusive item was to update the store from Northern Phoenix Creations to Northern Phoenix Coalition. This motion was brought forth by the Trans Chancellor because “creations” sound like a religious group. Whereas “coalition” is much more of a group of individuals of varying degrees of lived experiences.
On 20221221 the council appointed the Retard Chancellor as Director of the Council. The Bisexual Chancellor and Socialist Chancellor disagreed with this appointment. As the Council has recognized that bisexuals are superior, there are some bisexuals that can be classified as retarded. The Socialist Chancellor tried to use a show of force to block the appointment. They were quickly reminded that retard rage is real and far more destructive than anything the socialist can put forward.
With the start of 2023, the Northern Phoenix Council is complete and believes it will be a wild year. The first meeting is on 20230103 and the agenda is on Hollywood.
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